I dreamed I was at home, it was launch time and my mom wasn’t home yet. I had a glass in my hand when my mom arrived saying “I heard there was an car accident, some boys a few miles from here. Someone told me that the one who got worse is a 18 or 19 years-old black guy.” I drop the glass and my mom started yelling at me. I ran to my room and I started calling him. Nothing. No phone, no msn, no facebook, nothing… I called everyone, no one knew anything. I even called his ex-girlfriend. I told my mom and she drove me to his house. His brother opened the door, and I asked “Where is your brother??” I was completely freaked out. He ended up talking about the accident and that he didn’t make it. At that moment I frizzed and started crying. I asked where he was and his brother told me they took him to the hospital and that their mom was arranging the funeral. I spent the whole night at the mortuary, I was forceless but I couldn’t leave. The next day was the funeral. There was a crowd and only thing I did was cry, I couldn’t stop. In the end, before they buried him, they asked if someone want them to open the coffin one last time. His mom said yes and she was there for a while. I was there too and when she left I tried to stop crying. I hold his hand and I started remembering every single moment we spent together. I was just wondering “Why?” and thinking I didn’t had enough time with him. I took a deep breath, held his hand tight, I closed my eyes and kissing. And the last tear felt into his face, when I said “I love you”.
Then, I woke up crying."
- September 5th, 2010
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